Wednesday, June 19, 2013

463

     Today I took it easy on myself.
 That isn't something I can normally say, usually I want to push and fight and be a jerk to myself.  Today I didn't do that and it was a total win.  I did the Insanity Fit Test today.  I have been terrified to do the program again because of my knee and knowing how long I have been "out of the game."  I'd found a thousand and a half reasons why it was a bad idea and had resolved that I just couldn't do it.  That made me really sad.  Even though that program kicked my butt I loved how much it kicked my butt.

     I did lots of research on Insanity Modifications in general and then ones specific to bad knees.
Can I tell you something thing?
<rant> I fucking hate the phrase "bad knee."  My knee is perfectly perfect, there isn't anything bad about it.  My knee?  Inherently a knee.  Nothing else, no moral judgments on my knee please.  It's never caused anyone harm, taken a kid's candy or called anyone a mean name.  It's just a knee.  It bends and supports.  </rant> 
     OK.  Anyway, found some really great articles about those with worse knee injuries than mine, using words like torn, surgery and multiple surgeries that found a way to make the program work for them.  There were also a lot of really great videos on YouTube that actually showed some of those great mods.

     The hardest thing for me thought was actually following them and not "pushing though" or whatever.  Parts of my brain were all like "Bitch you better do better than that" when other parts were like "calm the hell down crazy face, do you hear what your knee is talking about?"  It was a crazy divide but the one catering to the well being of my knee and my me won out.

     It was touch because at times I felt like I wasn't doing it right or working hard enough for the work out to count.  That will be an on going hurdle for me for now on, I know that now in my logic brain.  One day at a time.  One modification at a time, one workout and one moment at a time.  The biggest thing that I read or watched and what is stressed even by Shaun T is Form Over Speed and Form Over Reps.  Do the workouts correctly and work at your own ability level.

     I won't get any where if I keep hurting myself.

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