Thursday, January 1, 2015

january 1, 2015

As far as feel better goes I think I can finally say that I am getting there.  N and I went on a nice long walk today in Prospect Park and I did some weight work on my new 55cm stability ball.

I really don't know what this coming year is going to be like and I'm not interested in making any "resolutions."  I do know that I am feeling more whole and sound mentally which makes taking care of my body a hell of a lot easier.  This past year has been some of the hardest times of my life to date.  Way harder than any battle I ever fought with myself when I first began losing weight.  I also don't believe at all that this go round will be any easier.  All I know is that it feels like the fog is starting to lift and that I feel quite a bit more clear headed.

I did get on the scale today and I weighed in at 185.4.  Oddly enough the number did not affect me at all.  I have been dancing around in the mid 180s for the past few months.  I haven't done any really working out for just over a month.  I'd just briefly been going to the Y to start back up slowly when I hurt my back.  While I was treating that I did not work out at all.  Last week I had a hellacious head cold beast that kept me from sleeping and eating too much and my appetite still hasn't leveled out.  I'm pretty thankful for not being about to eat large portions, I'd say that totally works in my favor.

In addition to weighing in I also got some photos and basic measurements.  I want to be really clear that I have no intention of alway and forever retaking these measurements, photos or weighing in.  What I do want to do though is be able to keep track of any progress made.

It was exciting to get these measurements, something solid and tangible to reference.  What was also amazing was the out pouring of love from N as he helped me get them.  He couldn't stop telling me how beautiful I am, holding me and giving small kisses.  Every once and a while I let all of that love in and it is just so wonderful.

Here is to a happier, healthier and fuller year.


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